Funny Shit (home) → computers → You know you're living in the digital age when...
Originally posted in 2003, let's see how things changed in ten years:
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail your mate who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
6. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
7. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a "9" to get an outside line.
8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
10. Your CV is on a disk in your pocket.
11. You learn about your redundancy on the 11o'clock news.
12. Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you lost all of your best jokes.
13. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.
14. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards.
15. Board members salaries are higher than all the Third World countries annual budgets combined.
16. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
17. Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
18. Your boss gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop with all the latest features, but you have time to go for lunch while yours boots up.
19. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in hospital.
20. There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your department desperately needs, but they can afford four full-time management consultants advising your boss's boss on strategy.
21. Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers".
22. You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.
23. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends"
24. You got this email from a friend that never talks to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the net.
25. YOU ARE TOO BUSY TO NOTICE THAT THERE WAS NO NUMBER 9.
1. You try to use your swipe card to open the door when you get home from work.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. Or read a real book in years. Or bought a physical album in years...
3. You have a list of 45 ways to reach your family of three. Phone numbers are the bottom of the list.
4. You instant message your mate who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they only have e-mail addresses, but aren't on Facebook.
6. When you go home after a long day at work you still check email on your smartphone.
7. You haven't had a landline in years, either at home or work.
8. You've worked for three different startups in as many years.
10. Your CV is stored in Dropbox. Is a disk like a thumb drive?
11. You learn about your redundancy on Twitter.
12. Your biggest loss from a system crash was your source control keys and uncommitted changes.
13. Your boss isn't 100% sure they know what you do any more.
14. You don't know anyone who's ever worked somewhere long enough to qualify for long service leave. Is it still a thing?
15. Your company spends as much on stocking the kitchen as they do paying you.
16. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
17. You attend so many meetups with food and bar tabs you're surprised when you have to buy your own.
18. Everyone has a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop, which never leaves the office.
19. Being sick is defined as you aren't conscious or you're in a hospital with no wifi.
20. There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your department desperately needs, but they can afford four full-time in-house recruiters.
21. Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers".
22. You had trouble reading something this long, so you checked three other windows partway through.
23. You got this joke from someone you've never actually met, but you've maintained contact across multiple social networks.
25. YOU ARE TOO STILL BUSY TO NOTICE THAT THERE WAS NO NUMBER 9... or 24.